awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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