What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize