your room smells of hookers.
And success
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
