Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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