i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
