Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
it was like his penis was on wheels.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Randomize
