moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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