I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Randomize
