We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
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