He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Randomize
