dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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