? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize