bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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