you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize