Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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