yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
