i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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