I hope mine doesn't look like that
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
