About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
