HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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