Please, let me fuck your mom
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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