well most of my day revolves around power hour
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm experimenting with sincerity
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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