so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
