I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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