At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Randomize
