What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
