i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
