so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Randomize
