Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize