But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
