were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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