I wanna bring you to show and tell
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I wish you could order shots online.
this boner is exhausting
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Randomize
