you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
