I cockslap morals
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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