just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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