so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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