North Korea, Best Korea!
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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