What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
