Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
