Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I looked at my own cervix.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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