there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
We have started to decorate penises.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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