Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
