So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
