you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Randomize
