wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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