i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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