I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
