The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
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