Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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