I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
