So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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